A letter to Father From a Daughter

A father passing by his teenage daughter's bedroom was astonished to
see the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy. Then he
saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the pillow. It
was addressed "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the
envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:-

Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you, but I'm
leaving home. I had to elope with my new boyfriend
Randy because I wanted to avoid a sc ene with Mom and you. I've been
finding real passion with Randy and he is so nice to me. I know when
you meet him you'll like him too - even with all his piercing,
tattoos, and motorcycle
clothes.

But it's not only the passion Dad, I'm pregnant and Randy said that he
wants me to have the kid and that we can be very happy together. Even
though Randy is much older than me (anyway, 42 isn't so old these days
is it?),
and has no money, really these things shouldn't stand in the way of
our relationship, don't you agree?

Randy has a great CD collection; he already owns a trailer in the
woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.It's true he
has other girlfriends as well but I know he'll be faithful to me in
his own way. He
wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my
dreams too.

Randy taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and he'll be
growing it for us and we'll trade it with our
friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime,
we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Randy can get
better; he sure deserves it!!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of
myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit
so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your loving daughter,
Rosie.

At the bottom of the page were the letters "PTO".
Hands still trembling,her father turned the sheet, and read:

PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbour's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than
my report card that's in my desk centre drawer.

Please sign it and call when it is safe for me to come home. I love